Eyes
10.29.05 (9:17 am) [edit]
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RAVEN EYES
You have Raven
Eyes!
Positive Traits: Intellectual,
Wise, Experienced, Honest,
Trustworthy
Negative Traits: Pompous,
Condescending, Withdrawn, Pessimistic,
Depressed
;http://quizilla.com/users/Lad...%20eyes%20are%20the%20win dows%20to%20your%20soul.%20What%20type%20of%20eye s%20do%20you%20have?/"> ;Your eyes are the windows to your soul. What type of eyes do you have?
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The news says it all, or does it?
10.28.05 (11:53 am) [edit]Running away.
Why do people run away? No matter what you are running from, you are running from something you can not or do not want to face. Maybe someone did something bad to you, then you must run away so you do not have to face the danger that is there, or maybe you are running from the bad thing that you did.
The following are excerpts from The Canton Repository. The dates will be listed with each one if they are on the article.
CITY DEATH SUSPECT HELD IN CALIFORNIA (September 1978)
A 25-year old man who had been charged last October with murdering a girlfriend was arrested Tuesday (9-5-78) in California.
Fred Merle Fix was arrested by agents of the Federal Bureau of Investigation in Highland and placed in San Bernadino County Jail.
He had been charged with the Oct. 24, 1977 shotgun slaying of Jeroie Sue McGuire, 26, of 901 15th St. NE.
The FBI had been called into the search for Fix last Nov. 23. He had been charged with unlawful flight to avoid prosecution.
FBI spokesmen said Fix had been using the name "Russell David Scott." They said he was arrested without incident.
…. So you were so much of a man that you ran away from what you had done. You ran all the way to the other side of the country, according to the FBI unlawful flight. You invented a new identity for yourself. Was Russell a better person than Fred was? Was Russell a real man?
ACCUSED MURDERER IS RETURNED (September 14, 1978)
Police Wednesday returned from San Bernadino, Calif., with a prisoner who was arrested on local charges of aggravated murder, attempted aggravated murder and aggravated burglary.
Fred Merle Fix, 25, of 2550 Kirby Ave. NE, was arrested Sept. 5 in Highland, Calif., by Federal Bureau of Investigation Agents.
Fix was charged with the Oct. 24 1977 shotgun slaying of Jeroie Sue Mcguire, 26, of 901 15th St. NE.
Fix’s Whereabouts were unknown since 9:30 p.m. Oct. 24.
…You abbandoned your car some outside of Stark County. The police found it the next morning but you were not in it. To this day I have a burning hatred for El Caminos. I wonder why! Your Mommy said you called her and you sounded lost and confused, but you would not tell her where you were or what was wrong. I wish I could call my Mom.
MAN SAYS INNOCENT TO MURDER (September 15, 1978)
Fred M. Fix, 25, of 2550 Kirby Ave. NE, Thursday was arraigned before Stark County Common Pleas Judge William A. Morris and Pleaded not guilty to charges of aggravated murder, attempt to commit aggravated murder and aggravated robbery.
His trial will be before Common Pleas Judge Harold E. Dehoff. A date has not been set.
He is represented by Frank Menster and Joseph Calabretta.
Fix was returned to Stark County from San Bernadino, Calif., following his arrest on an unlawful-flight warrant issued by the U.S. Dept. of Justice.
Fix is charged in connection with the shotgun slaying of Jeroie S. McGuire, 26, of 901 15th St. NE, during an alleged burglary of her home.
He is also charged with the wounding of Donald Batchel, 22, of Canton.
His whereabouts were unknown since the night of Oct. 24.
…They make it sound like you came to our house with the intent to rob it. That was not your intent. We all know very well what your intent was don’t we?! Or did you time out in sunny California make you forget what you had done? It has been twenty-eight years for me, and I have not forgotten, I will never forget. I wish you would come knock on my door in the middle of the night.
Quotes.....
10.25.05 (1:26 pm) [edit]This is a quote that I came across today that I really felt fit me and I wanted to share it.
You and me against the world
10.25.05 (1:10 pm) [edit]"Tell me again Mommy."
You and me against the world
Sometimes it feels like you and me against the world
When all the others turn their backs and walk away
You can count on me to stay
Remember when the circus came to town
And you were frightened by the clown
Wasn't it nice to be around
Someone that you knew
Someone who was big and strong and looking out for
You and me against the world
Sometimes it feels like you and me against the world
And for all the times we've cried
I've always felt that god was on our side
And when one of us is gone
And one of us is left to carry on
Then remembering will have to do
Our memories alone will get us through
Think about the days of me and you
You and me against the world
And when one of us is gone
And one of us is left to carry on
Then remembering will have to do
Our memories alone will get us through
Think about the days of me and you
You and me against the world.
"I love you Mommy."
"I love you too, Baby."
-Helen Reddy
My Mom used to sing this song to us.
I of course did not know how true to life this song would become for us. We have both hung on to this song. I can not speak for my sister, but I would suspect her reasons are quite similar to mine. This song was my Mom's way of saying her goodbye and her final I love you to me, and I to her. I look at it as her way of telling me that she is always there watching over me, us. And when she can't be ther to watch over us, then she knows that we will be able to watch over each other, my sister and I. We have not always done the best of jobs, caring for one another, but I believe that when we were lacking, Mom was there watching, and waiting for us to get it together for one another.
Fred took my mother from me and he took my childhood, but he left me my sister, and he left me my dignity, and my spirit. I have my pride, and I have my love, and no one can ever take those things from me.
I may have bad days and I may not always know which end is the correct end to drink out of, but I will be just fine.
Melis
I am giving in...for now.
10.21.05 (12:44 pm) [edit]So I am not as stubborn and hard headed as once I thought I was, or I now would like everyone to see me. I am going to begin posting here again. I miss my friends, I admit. I am not giving up my blogger site though. I need a place to put my thoughts permanently, and this is defintely not it. But I do like the people I have found here, including me. Shh, don't tell anyone about that last part.
Melis
The outline of life
10.21.05 (12:35 pm) [edit]When everyone was finally done interrogating me, I spent the night with my little boy friend next door neighbor. I am not sure if my sister was there or not. The only thing I remember specifically from that night was my friends mother telling someone or another that her son had told her that I had told him I said he[Fred] was going to kill my Mom. I do not remember anything else about staying there.
The next thing I remember specifically sitting in the living room of Tony and Joy Ledford's house(friend's of my father's and people that were entrusted with our care) while our Father told my sister and I that my Mother had died. I remember crying finally and being mad at my sister for sitting and coloring through the entire conversation. I didn't know at the time but I was not mad at her really but just mad. There was a lot of things to come in my life. I had a school change coming, I had a new mom coming, I had new responsibilities coming, and I had a trial coming. The little bit of a childhood I did have was long gone. Fred took my Mom, my childhood, my life and replaced it with a tape outline and a pool of blood.
Broken Silence
10.21.05 (12:24 pm) [edit]It was so quiet. My little sister was still crying, but almost silently. I am sure I was upset and I was probably crying as well. But I do not remember feeling that. I remember being afraid, but at the same time needing to be strong for my sister, for my Mom, for Don and for me. Through the silence I began to hear voices and what sounded like knocking at the front door. They were different voices-one's I had never heard before, but ones that were not frightening. I was still unsure of what to do, but I knew I could not stay in the bathroom forever. I heard what I thought was the little voice in my head telling me "open the door...open the door...open the door" over and over again. I told my sister to stay in the bathroom and not to move until I came back, and I slowly opened the bathroom door. I heard the voice telling me to open the door again. It wasn't in my head, it was coming from the carpet in front of the bathroom door in the hallway. It was coming out of Don-so was a lot of blood-he was hurt. His neck was gone, and his eyes were closed, but he was telling me to go open the door, so I went. I was so, I don't know, shocked I guess by the way he looked that I didn't even noticed my Mom at first. She was lying just a few feet further down the hall, half in the hall and half in the kitchen. She was face down sort of curled up like she had tripped over something and fell down face forward. She had the phone in her hand still up to her ear like she had fallen asleep using the phone. I didn't see any blood at first, but I knew she was not asleep. I looked at her for a split second and someone at the door caught my attention. I snapped my head toward the front door and saw several policemen on our porch asking me to help them get inside. They told me to be careful of the glass. I walked across the kitchen and I remember pushing the chair/stool up to the door. I do not remember what I had to do or why they could not get in, but after I got down from the stool a rush of people came inside. The first policeman helped me back across the kitchen and then took me back to the bathroom with my sister. I was still naked. He helped me get a towel and we got my sister out of the tub. Then he asked me to show him our bedroom so we could get dressed. (and so the others could get the scene under control) I had to call my Grandmother Omie. She was my Mom's Mom. I had to tell her that Fred had come to our house and shot Mom and Don. I told her that they took them to the hospital, and I told her I thought Mom was dead. I told her she needed to come to our house. My Dad came too, someone called him but it was not me. No one told me my Mom had died, I just knew. When they walked us out to take us downstaris to the landlords for questioning and stuff we had to walk past the whole scene again. They one cop carried my sister, but I walked. I saw the pool of blood. I saw the tape outline. The rest of the night was a blur of people and activity and questions and questions and questions. I had to tell so many people over and over again what happened. I didn't mind, but I was tired. Why did I have to keep saying it over and over again? Could'nt someone write it down?
October 1977
10.21.05 (12:21 pm) [edit]The next few days were kind of hectic. We were trying to get ready for Halloween and we spent a lot of time with Don. He took My Mom and my sister and I a lot of different places. Sometimes to a movie, sometimes to dinner, sometimes he came with us to friends' houses. Don was so much nicer than any one else my Mom was ever with. He spoke to her kindly, he spoke to us nicely, and he never spent the night. He was a real gentleman. I am not saying that they never had sex, but I am saying that he was kind enough and gentlemanly enough about it to make sure we as children never knew about it. Not something I can say for any other man in my Mother life, including my Father. I think he not only enjoyed spending time with my Mom, I think he was worried about her. I think he felt that she was safe as long as he was around. Fred would call and my Mom would hang up on him. He would drive by the house all the time. He never stopped because he knew that was trouble-until October 24.
We had gone to visit a friend of my Mother's, I believe her name was Wanda Knapp(?). She was doing something for Halloween, maybe a party, or giving us some candy or having us for dinner, something. When we arrived home, Mom, Don, my sister, and I were all in a really good mood. Everything seemed normal and ordinary. I don't know the exact time, but it was after dinner time, because my mom sent my sister and I to take a bath. She and Don went into the livingroom to sit on the couch and talk while we took our bath. I remember running the water, and pouring in the bubble bath. I remember both of us taking off all our clothes, and I remember my little sister getting in and standing in the tub while the water continued to run. I was waiting outside of the tub until the water was right to shut it off. All of a sudden I heard my mom shouting and I heard Don say call the police, and I heard Fred screaming to let him in. There was a loud crash, more screaming, and shouting and crying and loud bangs over and over and over. My sister was screaming really loud, I had to get her to stop. I did't not want Fred to know we were here. I was afraid he would find us and hurt us. I held her head in my arms and covered he mouth as tightly as I could and told her to be quiet. I was hard, she was only four, I was scared, she was even more scared. As quickly as it had gotten loud and chaotic, it got eerily silent. I removed my hand from my sisters mouth but we did not leave the bathroom. I did not know what to do. I did not know what I would find on the other side of the bathroom door. My stomach hurt. My stomach has always hurt when I have a bad feeling. I had a very bad feeling. To be continued...
If Only...
10.21.05 (12:19 pm) [edit]"Tell your mom that he (Fred) is going to kill my mom someday." That was the last thing I said to my friend that day before I went running down the porch steps to be with my mom. The police were there and they had Fred in hand cuffs. He was steaming mad. My Mom kept telling them she was OK and that they could let him go, but they said they had to take him downtown. She made me go upstairs to watch Tress, since she figured she was awake from here nap by this time. I did not want to leave my mom, but I did what she told me to do. After a little while my mom came up too. She told me everything was fine, but I could tell she was very nervous. She must have check the door lock and looked out the windows a hundred times. I found out later in my life that my mom was supposed to go down to the police station that night and file assault and kidnapping charges on Fred, but she ended up dropping them. If she would have followed through just that one time, maybe she would be here today. Maybe...
the post has been continued
10.20.05 (1:57 pm) [edit]THe post has been continued....check it out
melis
New Post
10.19.05 (10:13 am) [edit]I have a new post on my other blog if you are interested in reading me still.
Enjoy!
Melis
New posts
10.05.05 (12:47 pm) [edit]I have a couple of new blog posts but to check them out you will have to go here:
Please feel free to change your bookmark if you have me bookmarked!!
Melis
